Healing.

I hated church today.  That's probably a bad thing to say but it's the truth. I didn't want to go, I knew the preach topic and it's one I find difficult. Everything in me wanted to stay at home in bed, I was bargaining with God right from when I left work. "If the bus home is still there, I'll go", it was running 2 minutes late so I caught it easily. "If there's a sensible bus to church, I'll go", there was one that'd get me there with time to spare. I misplaced my keys and my water bottle emptied in my bag..."if I still manage to make that bus then I'll go", I made the bus. Don't bargain with God, He'll win. I didn't want to hear another preach on healing and incidentally I had a shooting pain under my left clavicle every time I inhaled today but the fact I didn't want to hear it made me go and listen. It's often the things that we need to hear most that we really don't want to. Plus, after posting about Taisija Generalova last week, I thought it tied in nicely.

The preach is part of the Seven Questions series at CCK and tonight Joel Virgo answered the question..."If God can heal, why doesn't praying for healing always work? (The preach will be available here at some point in the near future)

Joel made some good points...of which I shall recount my versions and my general view on things.
  •  Originally there was no sickness, it is through the Fall in Genesis that sin and sickness were bought into the world. Romans 8:20 "Against its will, all creation was subjected to God’s curse." It is our input that has brought about sickness. 
  • However, I do not believe that this means that if someone is ill they have committed a certain sin. I think this is a general explanation as to why sickness exists in the world. 
  • We must have confidence when praying for healing - God wants to put the world back to the way He intended. 
  • An option for why someone isn't healed is that their faith wasn't enough. This is a dangerous answer on it's own.
  • Remember, everyone who gets healed on this earth still dies!
  • Paul saw lots of people healed but he also saw and accepted sickness in himself and his friends - it was not to do with a lack of faith!
  • Luke was a doctor - God created doctors for a purpose, sickness is a reality, we can't just imagine it away.
  • God brought His Kingdom through Jesus, but we live in an inbetween time. Returning the world to His original design is happening in two stages. We have glimpses of heaven now when we see people healed etc. but we are also still living in a fallen world. Revelation 21:4 - "He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever." < this time has not yet come.
  • We must not become despondent or unbelieving about God's ability to heal us.We need to fight for it and remember that we pray because it works, not because it's "just good for the soul". 
  • Healing is not formulaic, we just need to draw close to God.
  • If healing doesn't happen at this time, it doesn't mean God loves us any less. Romans 8:32 "Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won’t he also give us everything else?"
So, I fall mainly into the despondent/unbelieving camp right now. Not so much for others, I believe others can be healed, I've seen others get healed (though I find myself feeling cynical even then). For myself though...this past year my health has been a mess. I am in pain quite frequently, I don't remember the last time I didn't feel fatigued, I take medication multiple times a day, it's massively affected me socially and emotionally and to be quite honest I'm sick and tired of praying to feel better. Now by no means do I feel bad all the time, far from it, but I'm definitely not on a par with most of my friends! And because I don't necessarily look ill, people don't really understand it.

I cried at church tonight. Mainly because I'm knackered and I get emotional when I'm tired. I felt very loved when I felt multiple people come and pray with me, I didn't ask for it and I didn't want it, but it was nice that they thought of me anyway. What I really need is a duvet day and a good nights sleep...

TTFN x 

Ps. The pain under my clavicle has gone. I'd like to think it's the ibuprofen and just one of those things. But there is a little part of me that clings to the possibility that it was God showing that He can do it...



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