Hazelnut Chocolate Spread.

I am a comfort eater. I find it hard to admit - but actually most people's attitude to food changes in relation to stress - some under eat, others like me - comfort eat. And as much as I wish I lost my appetite when stressed, I just don't.

So at 22:43 I am sat here writing about being stressed, eating hazelnut chocolate spread from the jar. I kind of bargained with myself - if I did something constructive like blogging, then it wasn't so bad to comfort eat because y'know - at least I'd actually be processing some of the stress.

So why am I stressed?

I still haven't got an official start date for my new job. The hope is that I will start this coming Monday, but it's looking less and less likely as the days go on. Tomorrow I am seeing Occy Health again and will the proceed to bombard HR with phone calls until I know what's going on. I am so ready to start and financially I cannot cope any more. I can barely afford food - thus making comfort eating completely irrational. The 88p chocolate spread I'm currently eating from the jar would be much better used on bread for toast...

Anyway, there is a trust induction on Monday which the other new HCA will be attending. If I can't attend next week I will potentially be waiting up to a month for another induction. To me, it seems utterly ridiculous to still be waiting 2.5 months after getting the job. My income is currently a couple of hundred a month which doesn't even cover my rent. Financially I'm drowning but trying to trust God that things will come right in the end. Starting on Monday is feeling more and more impossible but I believe in a God of the impossible so I'm praying and hoping for a miracle.

In more positive news...I visited the ward today; picked up my name badge and got my locker sorted. The ward has a wonderful sea view and all the nurses and HCA's were wonderfully friendly.  The next few days are relatively busy which will hopefully keep me busy and less stressed -  tomorrow involves Occy Health and chasing HR, which will no doubt extend into Friday - plus general housework and I'd like to blog about the summer festivals. On Saturday I'm first aiding an event in Surrey.

I am so ready to start work...

*Puts down the choccy spread*

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